FoxMoon Productions and the Blue Velvet Cafe are happy to host teas at various conventions in the area. Our teas are a little more laid back and informal at times, but we do still have some rules.

1. No Smoking at our events.

2. Keep a polite atmosphere. Do not start fights, act out in rude or obscene ways to purposely offend others or use foul language. These are grounds for dismissal from events without refund.

3. Above all Have FUN.

4. Please be courteous and remain in your seat during the teas unless you are bid to stand for something, or you are taking your leave. Please do not attack your host.
 

5. Please do not use the sugar spoon to stir and put the spoon back in the sugar. It contaminates the sugar and we have to throw it all away. If you accidentally use the spoon tell us and we will wash and dry the spoon. No harm done, just try not to use that spoon. You will be provided with something to stir with.

Simple enough, right?

Well here are some guidelines to go by for Tea Parties that you might attend. These are a generic Tea Party Etiquette suggested for use at any Tea Party Event no matter who the host is. They are especially smiled upon for the Lolitas who value proper conduct and polite society. These standards apply for both males and females alike.

Basic etiquette and manners that are used at a tea party are useful for all situations in life. Good manners are never out of place.

Proper Conduct for a Tea Party and what to expect:

As each guest arrives, they will be seated and politely wait for other guests to arrive and also be seated. Please be prepared to wait to be seated as well. Once all the guests have arrived, the hostess will be seated.  At that time, she will remove the napkin from the table and place it on her lap.
(In our case, your hostess will most likely be serving you with the other servers. Though I may sit and join the guests on occasion. Instead of picking up my napkin I will most likely welcome you all and bid you to begin in some polite manner.)

Only pull your chair out far enough so you don't bump the person next to or behind you. You should sit properly in the chair with your feet on the floor.

Elbows off the tables is always good form and shows that you do have manners.

Gloves are to be removed and placed in your bag or lap, not on the table.
One should never dine or drink with gloves on.

A tea party can be and is usually an elegant affair. That is why napkin etiquette is as important for your tea party as it is for a formal dinner.

Be sure to unfold your napkin and place it in your lap.  Leave your napkin on the chair, not the table, if you must leave the table early.

The servers who are serving tea and coffee will ask you as they approach you if you would like some, then ask you about cream for coffee, milk for tea, sugar, and/or lemon. (do not add milk with lemon, your milk may curdle)

Don't wish to have tea? It's not obligatory, so don't feel bad about saying 'no thank you' as they pass you. A cold beverage is also usually provided.

When seated at a table, raise only the teacup to drink, not the saucer.  Place the teacup gently back on the saucer.

If you are not seated at a table, simply hold the saucer in your lap with your left hand and raise the teacup with your right hand.  Return the cup to the saucer between small drinks.

Never sip or slurp tea. Unnecessary noises while drinking can be seen as rude in many places. Please remember your manners and politeness. Try not to purposely belch and be disrespectful to those around you.

There is an order in which tea party foods are to be eaten.  First, scones or muffins, then sandwiches, and lastly, sweets.

Take small bites.  Never stuff the whole sandwich or dessert in your mouth even though it seems small enough.

Never dip anything in the jams or creams that are provided for the table.  Double dipping is even more of a no no.

Scones are not to be eaten with a fork. Break off bite size pieces and add the jam or cream over your own plate with the utensils provided.

Seconds ~ If you are at an afternoon tea or low tea, and are not being served by wait staff, the hostess will usually pass things a second time, but, if not, it is acceptable to ask for something to be passed again, unless it has been removed from the table. If it has been removed by the wait staff from the tea table, especially at a high tea where there will be several courses, do not ask for seconds.

Place all forks or spoons on their corresponding plates.  Never lay a serving utensil on the tablecloth or table.

When the tea party is over, the hostess will place her napkin on the table. At that time you should fold your napkin in half or quarters and neatly place it on the table to the right of your plate. It does not need to be folded as neatly as the way that you found it at the beginning of the tea but it should not be crumpled or balled up either.
(Again, in our case I will most likely not be sitting at the table and will be serving instead, therefore I will at this time thank everyone for attending and wish them a pleasant evening stating that the tea is over. This is when you should fold and place your napkin on the table to the right of your plate.)

Practice these before going to a tea party, especially with children.  You will be surprised how much they will enjoy knowing the rules of etiquette.